To quote Dickens, "It was the best of times, it was the worst of times..." Oh how this applies to my life over the last 5 months! Of course it's obvious why this has been the worst of times but there have been some actual best of times too :) My favortie being the fact that I'm still alive. My second favorite, being able to eat anything I want and I'm still thin! That was a concept that resided only in my wildest dreams before. Also, who doesn't want an extended amount of time off work? Not to mention my low-maintenance hair... saving so much time and $ with a bald head!
I was just talking to a good friend and I said one of the greatest gifts I received from this experience is the realization of just how blessed I am. I see the world through new eyes. I never realized how loved I am. My friends are simply amazing. I love my family with all my heart. I have a good life!
Speaking of eating alot, I have gained 13 pounds. To put things in perspective, most of my adult life I have weighed in the low 140's, occasionally tipping the scales in the upper 140's. Last summer I mysteriously dropped about 10 pounds and was happily residing around 135 pounds. Over the course of chemo I hit a low of 113. So with my 13 pound gain I'm now at 126. I like this weight and have been told it looks good on me. I can't imagine being 20 pounds heavier now. So I guess the feeding frenzy is going to have to be reined in a bit!
In attempting to maintain my weight I decided now would be a good time to start getting more physical activity. I went to "gentle" yoga last week. I had to modify alot of things due to my lack of abdominal strength and laying on my tummy was out of the question but I completed the class. My poor legs were shaking most of the time and I am not "bendy" at all. The woman next to me probably had 20 years on me and she was able to put her head between her knees! After class I commended her and she explained she's been a dancer all her life. She was impressive and very sweet. I was a little shocked at my limitations and the fact that "gentle" yoga didn't feel gentle to me (I was sore for 3 days!), but I guess it's to be expected after what my body has been through. Gotta start somewhere, right?!
My sister-n-law, Katie, shared a funny story with me the other day, it's still making me chuckle! She was on the computer and my niece, Natalie, asks who's Facebook Katie is looking at. Katie says Auntie Becky's (mine). Natalie looks at the page again and then back at Katie and remarks, "That's not Auntie Becky, that person is too skinny!".
Speaking of Katie, she is coming to visit! She arrives tomorrow night. She really wanted to come while I was sick to help me out but I asked her to wait until treatments were complete and I felt good so we could have some fun together. I love Katie so much and think of her as my sister, not just an in-law. I'm really looking forward to the next week.
I hope this day finds you all happy and healthy, with smiles on your faces and gratitude in your hearts.
Much love, Reba
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Happy Anniversary to me!
Today is the 5-month anniversary from my first surgery, 2/24/10... wow. So much has transpired in 5 months... ups, downs, more ups, more downs ;) But happily a cancer-free body today!
I met with my primary care doctor today. It felt good to be back in familiar territory. We went over natural supplementation to help keep me cancer free. He explained we all have cancer cells in our bodies, it's just a matter of the the soil being right for them to take hold. I guess you just never know.
I'm feeling stronger every day. I am trying to focus on eating right, sleeping well, and getting some physical activity in on a regular basis, all so I can build up my endurance and strength again. My doctor and his staff all remarked on how great I look and told me I have a nice bald head ;) They said they admired my determination and positive attitude through all of this. I said I merely did what I had to do.
Considering what I've experienced these last 5 months, I feel GREAT! So happy to be at this point in the process.
Love to you all and as always, many many thanks! *MUAH* Reba
I met with my primary care doctor today. It felt good to be back in familiar territory. We went over natural supplementation to help keep me cancer free. He explained we all have cancer cells in our bodies, it's just a matter of the the soil being right for them to take hold. I guess you just never know.
I'm feeling stronger every day. I am trying to focus on eating right, sleeping well, and getting some physical activity in on a regular basis, all so I can build up my endurance and strength again. My doctor and his staff all remarked on how great I look and told me I have a nice bald head ;) They said they admired my determination and positive attitude through all of this. I said I merely did what I had to do.
Considering what I've experienced these last 5 months, I feel GREAT! So happy to be at this point in the process.
Love to you all and as always, many many thanks! *MUAH* Reba
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
CLEAN!!!
Friday's CT scan was CLEAN! Woo hoo!!! In 6 weeks I'll have a PT scan for additional follow up. Keep the good vibrations coming, they're working :)
Lot's of love, Reba
Lot's of love, Reba
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Good thoughts, vibrations and prayers please!
I am having a post chemo CT scan tomorrow... I'm feeling a little nervous but I'm very confident that it will be clean :) I know I have all of you pulling for me so I'll go into the test feeling very loved and supported! Thank you!!!
I went for my radiation consult yesterday and I will not be having the therapy at this point in the game. It's complicated, but long story short, the risks may very well outweigh the benefits so we are opting not to do it.
Happy to say I'm feeling more like myself each and every day. It's so darn challenging when I feel so bad post chemo to remember that it does indeed pass... it's simply amazing what the human body is capable of! Make sure you take good care of yours cause it's pretty darn awesome.
Busy weekend coming up in my neighborhood, happy PRIDE San Diego!
Lots of love, Reba
I went for my radiation consult yesterday and I will not be having the therapy at this point in the game. It's complicated, but long story short, the risks may very well outweigh the benefits so we are opting not to do it.
Happy to say I'm feeling more like myself each and every day. It's so darn challenging when I feel so bad post chemo to remember that it does indeed pass... it's simply amazing what the human body is capable of! Make sure you take good care of yours cause it's pretty darn awesome.
Busy weekend coming up in my neighborhood, happy PRIDE San Diego!
Lots of love, Reba
Monday, July 12, 2010
WAY overdue!
Hello All!
I'd like to start by apologizing for being tardy in blogging. I've had a couple of you ask what's up?! Well, my energy level this time is taking longer than I'd like to bounce back. I didn't really want to blog today either but I knew it was time and I figured it might perk me up a little :)
Last week was challenging but I'm happy to report I only threw up once (there is always a bright side). Oh, and I fell down once too ;) 3 am and I tripped myself, did a face plant into the coffee table and had a nice little black and blue cheek for several days. This past Saturday I experienced HELL Day. It's how I refer to the day in this recovery process that I hit rock bottom, face first. Friday was a treacherous night of insomnia. When I did fall asleep early Saturday morning, it was a fitful sleep filled with nightmares. Needless to say, Saturday was a horrible day of exhaustion, brain fog and literally feeling like I had been hit by a truck. I begged the powers that be to PLEASE let this be the worst of of it. Someone listened because when I woke up Sunday I definitely knew I'd turn the corner. My goodness, the difference a day can make! While I'm not exactly doing cartwheels just yet, and today I woke up with some laryngitis, I finally feel like I'm heading in the right direction. Now if my energy would just return... patience, right?
I visited with Dr. Xavier this morning. Even though my chemo is over there will now be lots of misc. things to do. The first is my consultation with the Radiology Oncologist, Dr. Mansey, this Weds. regarding a possible Brachytherapy. It is merely a consultation, suggested by the Tumor Board when they reviewed my file. I honestly do not know much about it but will have more to report after Weds. appointment.
Other things on the horizon are CT/Body scans, genetic testing, various cancer screenings, monitoring my anemia, reconnecting with my primary care physician and who knows what else at this point! While I've reached a major milestone, my journey is far from over.
I'm looking forward to seeing my primary as he and I have always worked on a natural supplementation plan for optimizing health. I'm looking forward to seeing what I can incorporate now to help boost my system naturally post chemo/cancer. I'm also very interested in a natural way to help with the menopause symptoms I'm dealing with [HOT FLASHES]. Why not HRT (hormone replacement therapy) you ask? Well HRT has shown to increase one's odds of developing breast cancer and that's the last thing I want at this point!
I decided the other night that now that there are no more chemo treatments on the horizon I want to blog with more regularity. My goal is to write something each week, either Monday or Tuesday, depending on doc appts, etc. Sound good?!
I'm kind of feeling a little disappointed today. I guess somehow with this being my last chemo, I slipped on my really powerful rose-colored glasses and thought this one would somehow be really simple and I'd bounce right back and get on with things! Reality is, it kicked my butt good, I'm really tired, I realize there is still much work to do and although my life will pick up again and resume some degree of normalcy, life as I knew it will never be quite the same. This makes me tear up and makes my heart hurt just a little but I'm a survivor and I'm determined to make my life the best if can possibly be. Yeah, it will be different...never again will I live with the blissful naivety of not knowing a grave illness and all it's ill effects from the inside out.
On a positive note, never again will I see only flaws in the mirror. I will be much less critical of my world in general. I hopefully will never complain about "having to work out" being thankful to simply be "able to work out". Going to work will be a privilege! I will laugh harder, love deeper, expand my viewpoints, open my mind, help when I can... I will smile, sit quietly and just be. I will feel the sun, breath in the air, admire the colors in my world with a renewed sense of appreciation. Life is really good my friends, don't ever forget that!
I've been to the edge. It wasn't pretty. I'm healing. It will take time. I'm alive. So much life ahead of me. The possibilities are limitless... now that's exciting!
Love, Reba
I'd like to start by apologizing for being tardy in blogging. I've had a couple of you ask what's up?! Well, my energy level this time is taking longer than I'd like to bounce back. I didn't really want to blog today either but I knew it was time and I figured it might perk me up a little :)
Last week was challenging but I'm happy to report I only threw up once (there is always a bright side). Oh, and I fell down once too ;) 3 am and I tripped myself, did a face plant into the coffee table and had a nice little black and blue cheek for several days. This past Saturday I experienced HELL Day. It's how I refer to the day in this recovery process that I hit rock bottom, face first. Friday was a treacherous night of insomnia. When I did fall asleep early Saturday morning, it was a fitful sleep filled with nightmares. Needless to say, Saturday was a horrible day of exhaustion, brain fog and literally feeling like I had been hit by a truck. I begged the powers that be to PLEASE let this be the worst of of it. Someone listened because when I woke up Sunday I definitely knew I'd turn the corner. My goodness, the difference a day can make! While I'm not exactly doing cartwheels just yet, and today I woke up with some laryngitis, I finally feel like I'm heading in the right direction. Now if my energy would just return... patience, right?
I visited with Dr. Xavier this morning. Even though my chemo is over there will now be lots of misc. things to do. The first is my consultation with the Radiology Oncologist, Dr. Mansey, this Weds. regarding a possible Brachytherapy. It is merely a consultation, suggested by the Tumor Board when they reviewed my file. I honestly do not know much about it but will have more to report after Weds. appointment.
Other things on the horizon are CT/Body scans, genetic testing, various cancer screenings, monitoring my anemia, reconnecting with my primary care physician and who knows what else at this point! While I've reached a major milestone, my journey is far from over.
I'm looking forward to seeing my primary as he and I have always worked on a natural supplementation plan for optimizing health. I'm looking forward to seeing what I can incorporate now to help boost my system naturally post chemo/cancer. I'm also very interested in a natural way to help with the menopause symptoms I'm dealing with [HOT FLASHES]. Why not HRT (hormone replacement therapy) you ask? Well HRT has shown to increase one's odds of developing breast cancer and that's the last thing I want at this point!
I decided the other night that now that there are no more chemo treatments on the horizon I want to blog with more regularity. My goal is to write something each week, either Monday or Tuesday, depending on doc appts, etc. Sound good?!
I'm kind of feeling a little disappointed today. I guess somehow with this being my last chemo, I slipped on my really powerful rose-colored glasses and thought this one would somehow be really simple and I'd bounce right back and get on with things! Reality is, it kicked my butt good, I'm really tired, I realize there is still much work to do and although my life will pick up again and resume some degree of normalcy, life as I knew it will never be quite the same. This makes me tear up and makes my heart hurt just a little but I'm a survivor and I'm determined to make my life the best if can possibly be. Yeah, it will be different...never again will I live with the blissful naivety of not knowing a grave illness and all it's ill effects from the inside out.
On a positive note, never again will I see only flaws in the mirror. I will be much less critical of my world in general. I hopefully will never complain about "having to work out" being thankful to simply be "able to work out". Going to work will be a privilege! I will laugh harder, love deeper, expand my viewpoints, open my mind, help when I can... I will smile, sit quietly and just be. I will feel the sun, breath in the air, admire the colors in my world with a renewed sense of appreciation. Life is really good my friends, don't ever forget that!
I've been to the edge. It wasn't pretty. I'm healing. It will take time. I'm alive. So much life ahead of me. The possibilities are limitless... now that's exciting!
Love, Reba
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