Yesterday the rain was tears... probably a little overdue? My first real cry since this all started back on February 24.
The day started off rather nicely. I spent 3 glorious hours with Tate Thomas. We played and belly laughed and had the best time ever. I love that he doesn't see me any differently than he always has... I'm just Grandma to him. :) We laid down for a nap together and my heart nearly overflowed as he drifted off to sleep cuddled up next to me, his little leg draped over mine. Love you little bug! When he left I realized how much I miss him and how challenging it will be to see him even less when chemo starts again.
I took a good long look in the mirror and knew it was time to do something about my hair. I headed out to the nearest barber and told him "take it off". 5 minutes and $10 later I was bald! I sat in my car for awhile looking at myself in the mirror. I reflected on the last 6 weeks and all the experiences and changes that have occured. The tears started.
I cried with real purpose. I looked directly into the face of my emotions, I acknowledged all my feelings, good and bad, and embraced them. And then I let the negative, useless ones go. There's simply no room for stress in my healing journey!
I'm a little emotionally "hungover" this morning but I'm climbing right back up into that saddle. I have one more week of feeling amazing before the battle resumes and I'm determined to make the best of this precious time. I have doctor's appointments to organize, people to see and yummy food to eat (while I still can ;) So this morning I'll get organized and later this afternoon I'll be visiting the wig store. Tonight I'll have a favorite dinner.
Today's shout out is for my sister Katie in Portland. She was finally accepted to the dental hygienist program at Mt. Hood college!!! Katie, you've worked so hard and you never took your eye off your goal. Your perserverance has paid off. You are such an inspiration to me! Thank you.
Today I'll be happy and thankful. Life is good. Reba.
Reba your a great inspriration my friend. I love you so much and the new hair style is pretty cute. I can't wait to see you so we can laugh about all the nutty things we did together when I lived in SD.
ReplyDeleteReba you are my rock. I am devoted to your reading your wonderful blogs. I fine your strength an inspiration. You are correct, we have so much to be happy and thankful for - we are lucky souls. Sending you lots of love - Linz
ReplyDeleteLife IS good... and it's so great to hear you say that. I love you, girl, tears and all. I'm so proud of you.
ReplyDeleteReba, you are the bravest person i know. I love that you are sharing your feelings and emotions with all of us. A good cry can release a lot of stress. Your positive energy has affected all of us and we are all so blessed by your friendship. Enjoy this week! Sending lots of love! Tracey
ReplyDeleteReba don't worry about the hair, it'll grow back when the chemo is over. Right now your inner beauty is shining bright for all to see and it is magnificent!! Sending you lots of energy and love!
ReplyDeleteYeah what Ben said!!! Love you Reebs!! You've always been my rock and I just admire your strength in all that you accomplish! xoxo
ReplyDeleteSee above... Everything they said with an extra big hug thrown in. A new wig may even give you a boost when you look in the mirror. Your inner beauty always shines through!
ReplyDeleteGina
So Reba, will you go w/ Red maybe...red as in a red wig, nothing like a red head to catch some attention, ha ha. Hang in there woman, we loves ya and miss ya. Thinkin' of you always! --G
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Reba. Very sincere. Very touching. You are amazing. Keep rocking the lobster. ;>) Keep it up. YOU are an inspiration. Sending love and healing thoughts your way. --Bob
ReplyDeleteReba you are so strong and bold and honest. I am so proud of you for all you;ve done and been through. You are an inspiration to me!
ReplyDeleteHey, you don't need a wig - everyone that knows you sees you, not your hair.
Do you want me to shave mine along with you?
Love,
Debra H.
Hair is ridiculously overrated (I should know)! The kids, Liz and I are all sporting our REBA bracelets! You are a rock star!
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